Jemma could not understand Cara at all. ‘Why on earth?’ was Jemma’s most asked question about Cara. They were twins after all, and looked exactly the same, both had a small light brown freckle under her lip, both had the same hairstyle, both wore the same clothes. It was Cara’s attitude that Jemma had difficulty in understanding. When their mum and dad told them to wash up, Cara would sigh as much as Jemma but Cara would actually do it. Jemma would run outside shouting, ‘I saw a cat stuck up a tree, I’m just going to rescue it’ or ‘Toby asked me round to help him with his homework.’
Jemma just could not understand it. She lay on her unmade bed and stared at the ceiling. ‘This must be the millionth time I’ve been grounded’ she thought. ‘Just ’cause I didn’t tidy my room…’ A knock on the door brought Cara’s face peeking round the door. She didn’t gloat. She never gloated. It was so unfair. ‘Why on earth is she never grounded?’ Jemma thought. Cara waited for a nod from Jemma and entered the room as best she could, avoiding toys, books and empty sweet wrappers on the floor to reach her sister. Jemma sat up and stared at Cara. Cara blinked.
‘What’s wrong?’ Cara began.
‘Why are we so different?’ Jemma responded.
‘I dunno… Nothing to do with genetics’ Cara paid more attention in class as well.
Jemma nodded and continued her examination of her twin. It was like looking in the mirror only it was someone else. Someone who looked exactly like you but wasn’t you. Jemma shook her head and sighed. ‘It’s no good, I’ll never work out the difference.’
Cara grinned and leant closer to hug her sister. ‘I love you’ she whispered.
Jemma smiled back ‘I love you too.’
‘We still going to swap?’ Cara asked sighing slightly at her sister’s mischievous grin.
‘Yup’ was the reply.
It was something they did, whenever Jemma was grounded, which was almost always, Cara pretended to be Jemma and do the things Jemma was supposed to, and Cara would go out and play with her friends. ‘I’d do the same for you’ Jemma told her twin, ‘except you never get grounded.’ Cara just nodded and murmured ‘Be careful with me.’ Jemma grinned and almost dashed out the room before remembering that Cara never dashed anywhere. She looked back at Cara, sitting on the bed, in almost the exact position she herself had been in only moments before and wondered ‘Why on earth does she do this for me?’ before closing the door.
Cara lay there thinking. ‘I am Jemma now’ she repeatedly thought, trying to make her body react as Jemma’s would. She sat up and started to make the bed. It was so difficult to think on a messy bed. ‘All those lumps and bumps digging into you.’ Smoothing the blanket, she sat on it and scanned her sister’s room. It was messy in every place, except for strategically placed spots of carpet. Cara rose and started to stack books, clothes and toys into the appropriate piles. ‘The carpet is pink’ she thought giggling slightly.
Jemma walked down the stairs one at a time, totally different from her normal two at a time bounding leaps. She smiled at her mother and said ‘Jemma’s still tidying her room, is it okay if I go out for an hour?’ Cara was so bloody polite and never told tales. Her mother nodded and carried on with the washing up. ‘I wonder if she ever notices or suspects’ Jemma thought as she walked calmly out of the house and once she was out of sight, ran towards Toby’s house.
Cara watched her sister out of the window and turned away. She didn’t exactly resent Jemma for having friends and having fun, but… Cara carried on tidying the room as best she could. Her eyes fell upon Jemma’s diary. To read or not to. Cara knew it was wrong, but maybe she could learn how to be popular. She sat down on the bed and opened it.
Jemma reached Toby’s house and ran up the stairs onto the porch. Ringing the bell, she smoothed both her hair and skirt. Toby’s mother answered the door.
‘Hello there… Jemma?’ she asked unsure of which twin it was.
‘Yup’ Jemma replied grinning, ‘Is Toby in?’
‘He’s in his room, go straight in’ was the reply.
Jemma thanked Toby’s mum, being polite like Cara did help sometimes.
‘Hey Jemma,’ Toby said barely looking up from his computer at her.
Cara read the first page. She read about Jemma’s crush on Toby and smiled, she already knew that. Pausing, she reasoned that if she knew that, she must know most other things in the diary so it wouldn’t be wrong to carry on reading. She turned the page.
‘What you playing?’ Jemma asked, moving closer to Toby.
‘Battlefield 1942. Wanna try?’ Toby replied, still not taking his eyes off the airoplane he was flying.
‘No thanks’ Jemma replied, flicking her hair over her shoulder, silently admiring his face more than the loop-the-loop he was attempting.
Cara read further into the diary, bits surprised her, the questions about herself were the main ones. ‘Why on earth is Cara this, why on earth is Cara that, why on earth does Cara do this and so on…’ she thought recalling the last 20 or so pages. ‘Hmmmm’ Cara thought, carrying on further.
Jemma knelt down next to Toby. ‘Nice haircut’ he told her grinning.
‘Thanks’ she replied giggling. ‘Nice… Erm, plane.’ she replied feeling foolish. Toby just grinned wider, looking at her.
‘You’re as pretty as your sister’ he told her, ruffling her hair up with one hand. Jemma squealed and tried to fend him off.
Cara sat there shocked. She couldn’t think about it. It wasn’t possible. It couldn’t be possible… Could it? Cara knew she picked up on things that Jemma didn’t but this… ‘It could just be her imagination’ Cara thought trying to deny it. ‘It’s not true’ she told the room. ‘I am not…’ she cut off and looked towards the door. Her mum wouldn’t let her out as she thought she was Jemma. Cara started towards the window, and began to climb down the side of the house. She had to know the truth. She had to.
Jemma frowned when Toby stopped paying her attention and went back to the game. She made the best of the situation and began to smooth her hair back into place. The doorbell rang and Toby grunted as he died yet again. Cara rushed in and Jemma looked up in double surprise, Cara never rushed anywhere, and why was she here, she thought.
‘Jemma, I need to ask you something’ Cara started.
‘Hey Cara’ Toby said, rising from the computer.
Jemma frowned. Toby rose for Cara but not her. ‘What?’ she asked curtly.
‘I… Jemma, can we go talk about this outside?’ Cara asked, she didn’t want Toby to know. She didn’t want to know, but she had to.
‘Yeah, lets go outside’ Toby agreed enthusiastically.
Jemma frowned even more. ‘What’s this about?’ she asked curiously.
Cara stood there looking at her twin. The person Cara thought was her twin. ‘Jemma. Did… Did you really see… I mean, I read in your diary… That you saw…’
‘You read my diary?’ Jemma screamed.
‘I knew most of it already!’ Cara tried to defend herself.
‘You keep a diary?’ Toby asked, scratching his head slightly. He was confused.
‘Yes, and you have no right to read it, even if you are my twin sister’ Jemma replied to both.
‘I’m not…’ Cara began
‘Not what?’ Jemma asked
‘Your twin sister…’ Cara began to feel tears well up.
‘What? Of course you are. How can you not be?’ Toby interrupted.
‘Jemma, please. Did you see Dad leaning over me with a tourch and a screwdriver and spanner? On more than one night?’ Cara silently wished that it wasn’t true. It could not be true…
Jemma looked startled. ‘I thought i did, but i thought it was a dream… It was wasn’t it?’ she looked like she was going to cry too.
‘What’s this about’ Toby asked. Computer games were easier to understand than girls.
‘You’re my sister, no matter what’ Jemma told Cara, who had turned towards the door.
‘No, I’m a machine. I have no sister, or family. I am a machine’ Cara replied. ‘You can have Toby to yourself now’ she told Jemma, resisting the urge to hug her a final goodbye, and then left the room, the house, the town.
Cara walked and walked, north, or so she reckoned it was. She was a robot. A machine made to look like another human exactly so she could learn from Jemma. ‘From the birth of Jemma, to now’, she thought, ‘I was manipulated to look and act like her. But I couldn’t copy exactly.’ Cara walked further and further north. Towards the ocean. She had enjoyed the ocean. Or at least Jemma had and so she had emulated.
A life guard saw a young girl of about 11 or 12 walk along the sand by the waters edge and turned his attention to the magazine he had brought up with him. The young girl turned suddenly and walked into the sea, having to swim when she reached her depth. Further and further she swam, til her robotic arms and legs became tired and she could swim no further. The life guard scanned the sea ad returned to his magazine. ‘Goodbye Jemma. I love you’ Cara cried as the salty water rushed into her mouth and covered her entire body. Further and further, Cara went, the water pressing in on all sides. Her battery ran out as she touched the sand with one foot.
